Thursday, April 30, 2009

Dark Frances

Warning: Lots of the eff word.

Another warning: Big fucking emo bullshit ahead.

Okay. So I just finished watching Thirteen and maybe I'm just feeling emo. And I really fucking hate being emo, but I just gotta vent for 2.5 seconds, I promise. Fuck it. I'll vent as much as I want because this is my damn blog.

I am so sick and fucking tired of people who offer nothing but empty fucking promises of "I'm always here for you." That is such bullshit. You aren't fucking here for me. You don't give a fuck about me. Your "friendship" is so fucking empty. You are so fucking empty. People that say that never mean it. And the worst part is that I can't even be angry about it. Because I'm no better. I haven't been there for people who mean the most to me. It's like in people's moments of need, I just can't handle it. I get so fucking freaked out about the seriousness of the situation, I just leave. I feel like I'm not the one to help them. I don't ever know what to do. But you know what? In situations like that, what the fuck can you do? Nothing. Just suck it the fuck up and just sit there. And just listen. Don't even fucking say anything. Just fucking be there. That's what I want someone to do for me. I don't want you to give me advice or tell me how your situation is worse. I want someone to just fucking listen. I want just 1, just 1 fucking person to listen. And that's my fucking problem. I feel like I'm not allowed to feel. I keep my emotions in this neat little square inside of my chest and I am NEVER NEVER allowed to show weakness. And I'm fucking tired of it. Sometimes I just want to fall apart. Let it all come spilling out. Shatter this fucking illusion that everything is okay. Because it's not okay. It's just not.

Okay. Rant over. This blog has become my best friend. My listener. Sorry to those who had to withstand my potty mouth. What can I say? Fuck is the most therapeutic word available. This is why I live in my little fantasy world. When I step into reality, I get kind of overwhelmed. Ignore this post. I am sane. I just have some little break-downs sometimes.

Promise the next post will be lighter. Well, actually my next post is going to be about the movie Thirteen, so I can't really promise that. There's a reason I try to stick to posting about Twilight. Dark Frances is a little scary sometimes. That's why I keep her in that little box in my chest.


Wednesday, April 29, 2009

It's sexy time!

In honor of How To Be premiering on IFC Festival Direct today, (I am in mourning because I cannot watch it) I have decided to post a picture of Rob looking less obviously sexy. He is a bit deranged-looking here, but I heart him anyway. Enjoy!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

It's funny...

how my 'an unhealthy Twilight fixation' category has almost as many posts as my 'on a more personal note...' category. Might say something about how truly unhealthy my fixation is.

In the Land of Women

I am warming up to Dish Network. And that is partially because of HBO. Today I got to watch In the Land of Women, which I wanted to see because of Kristen Stewart. And, I gotta say, I went in not expecting a whole lot. I'm not really an Adam Brody fan. I was before The O.C., but that show kinda ruined him for me. But I was really, really wrong about this movie.

It was so much more than the fluff they show in the trailers, which is true of so many movies. The trailer is almost always a misrepresentation of the whole film. I was really blown away by Adam Brody, Meg Ryan, and Kristen Stewart here.

Kristen's performance is what I imagine her personality to be like in real life. I obviously don't know her in the least, but I imagine that she is sardonic and tough with a dry sense of humor, much like Lucy. Anywho, not wanting to get too analytical here because I am not nearly a film critic nor do I have the verbal elegance to make this critique sound any better than what follows: This was a really moving film with great performances from all. Thought-provoking and full of dry humor, this is a definite must-see for anyone - Kristen fans especially.

P.S. Kristen was soooo thin in this movie. I'm trying to recall if she looks that thin in Twilight or in the Cake Eaters. I don't remember thinking so, but in this one I was a little shocked at how small she really is.


Sunday, April 26, 2009

YT disappointment

I must say that, as of late, I have been really disappointed in my daily YouTube visits. None of my subscriptions have been posting new videos lately and for that I am sad. I used to watch YT all the time and now there is nothing to see. :( Maybe I should try to have more of a life like these people. Hmmm... Naw, I'd rather live in my little fantasy land. To compensate, I am spending double time reading my Twi blogs, which is turning out to be a pretty good distraction.

P.S. I love that I have been getting comments on my blog. You guys srsly make my day. Comment, comment, comment! I will love you long time.


So, I've had dreams about Kristen and Taylor and I wanted oh so badly to dream of my lovely Rob. And it finally happened last night. It was naughty and he was wearing his Ray Bans. That's all I'm at liberty to say. THANK YOU COSMOS!


Friday, April 24, 2009

Annoyed with Dish Network

Okay, so my dad had this brilliant idea to get rid of Comcast and get Dish Network. At first, I was excited because he told me we would have HBO, which means True Blood. YAY! Then I realized that we no longer have On Demand, which means we no longer have IFC Film Direct, which means I can no longer watch How To Be. Which means I will have to wait and watch it on DVD. GRRRRRRRRR! Why oh why oh why?? When I heard we would be able to watch How To Be On Demand, I thought "There's no way we'll have that chanel." I checked and we did and I was so stoked and counting down the days until April 29. It was so close! If only we had waited another week to get Dish.


Thursday, April 23, 2009

ET's New Moon coverage

Damn ET for luring us all into watching this. We wait for so long and they give us a little over 4 minutes of coverage, which I have to say I am grateful for. But I'm just mad it was so short and very little on-set stuff. It was mostly stupid questions we've already heard answered before. Although, I must admit I will never pass up a moment of Rob speaking. Even if it means him just counting to 100 in an interview. That would be okay with me. And of course they have to draw the damn thing out. There's more "exclusive footage" tomorrow. I hate ET! I don't like watching this show at all, but you better believe I will be there tomorrow just drooling in front of my TV.

Watching this has made me debate whether I want to watch Twilight tonight or start New Moon. I have put off my re-reading of the series because I have been reading Wide Awake and my Dali biography. But, watching this footage makes me yearn for my real Twilight characters. I am torn. What to do?


Funny Rob Interview

Watch what he says at 3:11. I'll bet they did!! I am such a perv.

Rob impersonator - Robpersonator?

So I was in Target today, strolling the book aisles (staring at the copies of Twilight even though I have them and read them all the time cuz I'm sick like that) when I came across this in the magazine section:

What the? So, I already really hate the fact that, for some reason that I cannot understand, people compare him to Rob. I really don't get it. They're both young and hot, but that's about it. I used to kind of have a baby crush on Zac, but then he got all Hollywood with his aviators and people started comparing him to Rob and that just pissed me off. Is he trying to have Rob hair here? Cuz you're coming up really short, buddy. Get over it. You're not gonna be Rob, so quit telling your stylist to "Add more gel. I gotta be hotter than that Twilight dude." Cuz it's not cool. And we are not fooled.


Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Wide Awake Chapter 48

Because AG is the greatest, she did give us two chapters just like I wanted! She split 48 into two parts and I read through them both so fast. They were both monumentally good. This girl has so much talent. I swear, even if the story had no mention of Twilight, I would still love it. I hope she is able to publish it, because it seems to be her calling. I hate waiting for new chapters! Only 49, 50, and an epilogue to go. I hope she splits the chapters up. I realize it isn't more to read, but it feels like it when she does that. Until the next chapter, I guess I will keep re-reading the sexiest, angstiest chapters. Like 36 and def. 48 again! Check angstgoddess003 out here: Wide Awake.


It was a Kill Bill kinda day

Decided to have a marathon of Kill Bill today because it was my day off and, well dammit, cuz I wanted to. You can never get enough of Quentin Tarantino. Here are my favorite scenes from both volumes:

Vol. 1
- Vernita shoots at Beatrix through the KaBoom! cereal box
- O-Ren cuts off Boss Tanaka's head
- The fight with the Crazy 88s
- Any scene with Gogo. She is so badass and I want to be her for Halloween one year.
- Beatrix realizes that she no longer has a baby in her belly
- "You're name is Buck right? And you came here to..." *smashes head in the door*

Vol. 2
- Training with Pei Mei
- Escaping the grave of Paula Schultz
- Meeting Hatori Hanzo
- Elle describing to Budd just how deadly a black mamba is while he writhes in pain on the floor
- Beatrix throws tobacco spit at Elle, who responds with a disgusted "Gross."
- Beatrix plucks out Elle's eye and squishes it between her toes
- Bill explains to Beatrix why she will never be successful as Arlene Plympton and why Superman is a superior superhero
- "You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person. But every once and a while you can be a real cunt."
- Beatrix weeps on the floor of the hotel bathroom for all that she has lost and the precious child she has gained
- Uma Thurman as Beatrix Kiddo aka The Bride aka Black Mamba aka Mommy


It's sexy time!

Happy Wednesday everyone! Enjoy.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Things are looking up!

I just got the news of my life: One of my favorite people in the world, Sarah, (the notorious one who proved that not everyone loves Edward Cullen) might just be moving close to me soon. Really close. Like we could be getting an apartment together and I can't explain how happy that makes me. She is like my soulmate in a girl. YAY! YAY! YAY!

Tonight I will finally get around to reading chapter 48 of Wide Awake and I am so excited! I know it has been posted for 2 days, but I have been so exhaused the past two nights that I couldn't stay awake. But tonight, I will finally get to see what happens. Dum dum dum.


Monday, April 20, 2009

New fave Rob interview

Officially my new favorite:

I gotta say the whole tee/blazer combo is perfection. I love his serious faces at 3:08 and 3:24! Yes, I realize it is completely creepy that I paused at those moments more than once to record the exact times they occur here. Shut up.

On a less superficial note, I love how he talks about how because Edward can't sleep, he has no marker for time. I couldn't imagine how awful "life" would be if I couldn't sleep. I can't tell you how many times sleep has been an escape from sadness or stress for me. What if you could never escape these things? Sleep offers so much to us beyond the obvious physiological need we have for it. That really makes me have a new appreciation for the torture Edward's life must have been before Bella. And how much of an escape watching Bella sleep must have really been for him.

Back to the swoony, superficial stuff. I love when he laughs. And when he talks about taking his shirt off being the most embarassing day of his life. Oh, Rob. (I love when he says "...unless you literally can't recognize me as a human." and "especially when you're not a gym bunny.") So cute and self-deprecating.

And I think it's cool that he doesn't watch his performances. Reminds me of another fellow I fancy. Johnny Depp, maybe?

Oh, and I love that he cares enough about the story of New Moon to be hopeful that he is kept out of most of the scenes. He's so not Hollywood.

And, yes, I officially rule because I learned how to imbed a YouTube video here. (I am technologically lame.) Nooch.


Saturday, April 18, 2009

So completely gracious

The more and more I read my insane amount of Twilight blogs, I am just so completely impressed with how gracious the cast is being. I have yet to read a fan encounter when the cast has been rude to anyone. It's so cool to me that these actors spend such long hours on set and yet still at the end of shooting make the time to say hi, take pictures with, and sign autographs for the fans. I don't think most celebrities would take the time to do this. In this one post in particular, I was especially impressed: awesome cast. It's so cool that the cast acknowledges the fans who spend six hours in the cold rain just hoping to catch a glimpse of them. And not only do they wave and smile, they take the time to tell them how much they appreciate them waiting around. It just shows you why the Twilight cast is so popular and loved by their fans.

Sharing the wealth

So, I finally decided to ask my mom to read Twilight. I think I have withheld it from her for so long because I wasn't sure if I wanted to share something that was so close and special to me with anyone else. Selfish of me, I know. How dare I deprive anyone of the wonder of Edward Cullen. It's hard for me to explain why I haven't ask her to read it until now. I guess if I think that if I don't share the things that are special to me that they will remain slightly more mine. I will have some kind of ownership. I told you it was hard to explain. Anywho, she has been saying that she wanted to read the series, so tonight I brought her the book and told her once she started, she wouldn't be able to stop. That the pages were laced with crack and she said "I'm not sure if I will have time to read all of them." I proceeded to say "There is abso-friggin-lutely no way you can read the first one and not want to finish the other 3." She said she wasn't starting the book tonight, but I know that once she does - that all will be lost.

Part of me is a little apprehensive to have her read it. I'm afraid she will think "Wow. My daughter is juvenile." Or she'll think that I'm a complete weirdo. But, she's my mom so she'll love me no matter what. It's just like when you try discussing Twilight with the real weirdos (the non-Twilight fans or those completely unaffected or oblivious to the series) and they look at you like "Oh. You're one of those Twilight people." You're almost slightly embarassed to admit you've read the series to people who don't get it. Then you get all defensive when they make fun of you. Oh the dilemma of being a Twilight fan. We lovingly mock the series and make funny spoof videos and blogs completely dedicated to making fun of Twilight fans and ourselves, yet we let NO ONE outside of our little circle make fun of us. It's like when you can say bad things about your family members when no one else can.

Anywho, I can't wait to find out what my mom thinks. And if she's anything like her daughter, she will fall embarassingly in love with a fictional character.


Friday, April 17, 2009

Mucho happiness

I just read that chapter 48 of Wide Awake will be up late tonight or sometime tomorrow! I am so happy. I have been dying for an update. I wish there was more than one chapter though. Oh well. Never look a gift horse in the mouth. SQUEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

I love my blog!

Even if no one reads it.

That is all.

Twilight: The Score

Yes. I succame to the madness yet again. I bought the mp3 version of Twilight: The Score today. And... I. love. it. I love having music without lyrics. If there are lyrics, I have this compulsion to sing. I must sing. So it's hard for me to listen to music while I read, blog, etc. But now I can listen to music and not sing. But I do admit I still hum. What can I say? I was born to be a rockstar.

I gotta say I had a really frigging hard time downloading it. I ordered it from Amazon (which is where I buy everything.) At first it was saying that my payment had failed and that I needed to choose another payment method. But the music was showing up under my account as having been purchased. So I called customer service and the lady (who I had great difficulty understanding due to a bad connection and an indistinguishable accent) told me that they had received my payment and I was all "Well, where's my music?" (I'm not normally haughty with customer service people, but I was irritated that I couldn't understand her and panicked that I didn't have my damn Twilight). She pulled up my account and helped me get to the downloading part. So, I got off the phone and continued downloading the rest of the songs. Well, I got through 12 of the songs when evil, crappy iTunes popped up and for some reason it interrupted my downloads. So I only ended up getting 12 songs. At this point I was so annoyed that I almost just gave up, but then I realized I didn't have "The Lion Fell In Love With the Lamb." And you know I had to have that shiz. Of course when I called back it was the same lady and she sounded annoyed with me. I know she was probably thinking "God, not this annoying Twilight nerd again." Anywho, she pulled the downloads back up and I was able to get all of the songs happily onto my mp3 player. Yay for technology! I then proceeded to blissfully listen to my wordless music while swinging on my porch swing munching gummy bears and reading my Dali biography. Contentment at last.


For experimental purposes only

Today I tried my brother's Cherry Dr. Pepper (for experimental purposes only, of course) and I gotta say: WHAT A RIP-OFF! It tastes exactly the same as regular Dr. Pepper. The only difference: The cherry is slightly red in color. It's kind of ridiculous. I am not a sucker! You will not take the same old drink and repackage it and advertise it with Gene Simmons and expect me to buy. Oh no! Well, I didn't buy it in the first place, my mom did. But that's not the point. Whatever.

Screw you Dr. Pepper!

I am awesome

In case you haven't noticed, I managed to create my own banner for this blog and I am quite pleased with myself. When I told my brother of my success, he scoffed at my apparently rudimentary skills. He learned that sort of thing in kindergarten. Look, I know I am behind the times. I remember a time when I knew WAY more than him about all things technological and now I am like the caveman learning to start a fire. Oh well. I am still proud of myself and I must pronounce that I AM AWESOME.


Thursday, April 16, 2009

A (small) victory

I was trying on work pants yesterday and my size (which I will never, ever put here) was way too big on me. SUCCESS!!! It has been so long since I have actually bought any clothes (because all of my money has gone to buying makeup lately) and I was so friggin encouraged. All of the torture of eating egg whites and not drinking soda has ACTUALLY payed off!!!!!!!!

Rings of the Nibelungs

This movie came on today and I REALLY wanted to watch it, but I had some stuff to do so I couldn't and I am very sad. :( I got to see some of it while I was getting ready to leave and I gotta say it has me interested. Rob (of course) pulled me in. It looks a little cheesy and I was giggling at parts that probably weren't intended to be funny. I have been searching to see when it comes on again and I don't see it airing again any time soon. GRRR. I guess I'll just have to buy it on DVD. I plan on buying a region free DVD player soon so I can play How To Be, Little Ashes, and all of Rob's other movies available only in region 2. Can't wait to see him in stuff besides Twilight. Not that I don't enjoy him in that, it's just that I want to see him play something different. Something bad. Something naughty. Ahem. Sorry.


Another Twilight dream

Last night I dreamed that I went to the Cheesecake Factory with my family and Taylor Lautner was there. Except he was really small. Like a child. I kept asking him why he was so small, that I thought he was supposed to get really buff for New Moon but he wouldn't answer me. He just kept smiling at me with his super white teeth. And I kept hugging the crap out of him and I was able to pick him up and I was carrying him around.

I know.

I'm weird.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

It's sexy time!

In honor of my love for Rob Pattinson and all things tall, dark, and handsome I have decided to make every Wednesday my official "It's sexy time!" day. So enjoy today's hawtness:

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

I feel like Bethenny...

from the Real Housewives of NYC. Why is it that whenever someone finds out I'm single they give me this look filled with pity and sadness? Like I'm some pathetic, lonely little being who has no idea how to attract a man? People try to tell me how to get a man. "Wear your hair this way. If you would only wear your clothes a little tighter. You should wear more jewelry. You don't go out enough." It's maddening! You know, I have had boyfriends before and I am not completely ignorant about how to attract a man. The problem is that I have not even seen ONE SINGLE man in the last, oh what is it now 3 years?, that has even remotely interested me. It's not like I'm terrified to approach someone. I just haven't seen anyone. Oh yeah, I've seen some hot guys, but it's not like I'm gonna go up and throw my boobs in his face and start talking all breathy and giggling. That's just not how I roll. Some people don't seem to get that not everyone works the same way. I don't feel like I have to slut it up just to get someone's attention. That's not the kind of attention I want anyway. I don't want someone's first impression of me to be that I am some brainless tramp. And if I throw my boobs in his face and he DOESN'T think I'm some brainless tramp, then I don't want that kind of guy anyway.

I'm beginning to fear that there is no guy out there who will genuinely be interested in what I have to say. Let's be real here, I know that guys have hormones. They think with their... We all know this. But, there has got to be guys left who genuinely want to meet an interesting person and be in a relationship with someone who challenges them and intrigues them. RIGHT?? If not, I think I'd rather just keep dreaming of marrying Rob Pattinson. Well, I'm always going to be dreaming that anyway. Haha.

Anyway, I just get sick of people treating me like I have some debilitating illness because I am single. I am not a leper, people! OF COURSE I want someone to share my life with, but it's not like I'm over here slitting my wrists and sobbing into my pillow at night because I am just oh so lonely. I do have an identity of my own, which is more than I can say for some people. Besides, being single does have its advantages. Like not having to share the remote, being able to listen to Paramore on loop in my car without complaint (with the exception of Matt), and being able to drool over all things Rob Pattinson, Johnny Depp, and Ryan Gosling without some doofus jealous reaction. :)

Moral of the story: The next time one of your friends tells you that they are single, don't gape at them with a sorrowful expression in your eyes or ask them the dumbassiest of all dumbass questions: "Why?" Just nod your head and say "Cool. It must be nice not having to share the remote."

Peace out homies!

New project

I'm excited at the idea of a new project. I've had this idea for a while now to start a book club and I was talking to my friend Sarah and suggested that we (including her friends and her sister) start one up. I thought each of us would get to pick a book a month and start and blog and just post about the chapters. I hope we get it up and running and actually stick to it. It would be so much fun.

I love blogging and actually having someone to chat with and I hope we can get this ball rolling!


Sunday, April 12, 2009

New YouTube channel

My brother and I decided to start a collaboration channel on YouTube. We both like movies and talk about them incessantly, so we decided to start recording our conversations. Anywho, check it out if you're interested. Also, take a look at my channel and my bro's.


Thursday, April 9, 2009

The Cake Eaters

Watched it last night and, again, I am tres impressed with Kristen. I don't know what else to say besides she is fantastic. Watch the movie! Her portrayal is haunting. Next on the list:

- Into the Wild
- Thirteen
- The Haunted Airman

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


I saw Adventureland today and I must say I am mighty impressed with Ms. Stewart. My (totally-hetero) girl crush is growing. She is completely fantastic in the movie. It turned out to be way more heart-felt than I expected. From the trailers, it looked like it was going to be just another raunchy Apatow-esque comedy. It had so much more depth than that.

The movie is about a recent college grad (Jesse Eisenberg) who, due to circumstances beyond his control, has to take a summer job at a local amusement park. He falls in love with another employee of the park, Em (Kristen Stewart). Thoughout the movie he makes friends with a pretty funny group of characters and really gets to know Em. Hearts are broken, but all is well in the end.

I was really surprised by Ryan Reynolds' performance here. I am so used to seeing him play the funny guy and I don't think he had one funny line in the movie. He plays the park's unhappily married maintenance man. His character actually comes off as kind of pathetic and you feel pretty sorry for him in the end.

Anywho, what appealed to me so much about this movie is how it kind of parallels my life. Yeah, I know all I do is bitch and moan about my current status, but you can skip this part if you want. I am that recent college grad who has a job "here basically because my life fucking sucks." I am just as desperate to find a connection with someone as the main character Brennan. There is no way to describe to someone what it feels like to really have no fucking place or direction. Just like Brennan, I have no fucking clue what comes next in my life. I know what I want, but will I ever find my metaphorical New York City? (Which just so happens to be LA. Haha) Anyway, I could blab on about feeling unfulfilled and lonely and shit, but then this blog will get all pathetic and I don't want to be like Connell. Go see the movie and you'll understand what the fuck I mean.

Sorry for all the expletives in this one, but I'm feeling particularly dark right now. Plus, I think I'm reading way too much Wide Awake. haha.

Go see the movie. You won't regret it. This one is now in my top 5.

Ins and Outs

- My blog/YouTube channel
- Target Ray Bans
- Jelly bracelets
- Adventureland
- China Glaze's For Audrey polish on the toes
- Frosty white polish on the nails
- Twilight blogs (especially Letters to Rob)
- Wide Awake (Twi fanfiction)
- New Twilight riddle
- Buffy, season 4
- Special K's Chocolatey Delight

- Being unhappy with my station in life
- Meat with a bone. Bluck!
- Being poor
- Listening to ANY radio station (How many times can they play that damn Nickleback song?)


Yay for Target Ray Bans!

Look at my fakes in front of the man who inspired them:

They make me happy.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Kristen fix

Going to see Adventureland tomorrow. Buying The Cake Eaters soon.

Holy Lord!

I just watched the trailer for How To Be and I have have have to see it! Now! Unfortunately the closest showing is in Tennessee. I guess I'll have to wait for the DVD. hiss boo.

Crap I bought

Here's some stuff I got and have been meaning to post:
Hello Kitty Tippy blush I got in a Makeupalley swap:
Love Rock Grand Duo blush:
The 187 brush which, after two uses, I am still disappointed in. Maybe the third time's the charm?
And my favorite thing: My Twilight car decal!!

It's sexy time!

My all-time favorite picture of Rob. Takes your breathe away, doesn't it?

Reasons I love Rob Pattinson...a visual guide

I love Rob Pattinson because:

He wears Ray Bans.

He's Edward freakin' Cullen.

He is oh so pouty.

Even here I want to do him.

He is always hot in a tie.

He even looks good smoking a cigarette. Ick.

He doesn't want YOU to touch him there. Only me.
Sometimes he's sad. :(

AND the most important reason of all:
His wonderful, wonderful hair.


Monday, April 6, 2009

Always give things a second chance...

I am listening to Pokerface by GaGa right now and I am actually really starting to like it. I don't like the part where she goes Pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pokerface. But the rest is pretty good. Still don't like Just Dance though.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

It's not a myth! Team Jacob people DO exist.

I have always read of these Team Jacob people, but I had never met one. Until my friend Sarah read the Twilight saga. While she was reading the first book, she told me that she didn't like Edward. The conversation went a little like this:

Me: So, how you liking Twilight? Isn't Edward dreamy?
Sarah: Not really.
Me: Wha?!?!
Sarah: I don't really like Edward.
Me: *guffaw* You're kidding right?
Sarah: No.
Me: But why on God's green earth not?? Did you read about his hair? And the beautiful bod? And his smell? And cool skin? And the way he rubs his marble skin against Bella's neck? And---
Sarah: I don't like that he said no good music came from the 70s and 80s.
Me: Surely, you can't dislike the man just for that. Sure, that's a flaw, but you can overlook it for his extreme hawtness!
Sarah: It's not just that.
Me: *croak* What else then? (angry now)
Sarah: Well, I think it's kinda creepy that he watches her sleep.
Me: No, it's not! It's sweet. He is fascinated by everything that has to do with her.
Sarah: He's a stalker.
Me: I'm hanging up now.

After starting New Moon, Sarah texted me with this: "I love Jacob!"
This was our conversation after the text:

Me: More than Edward??
Sarah: Definitely.
Me: So, you are one of those Team Jacob people, huh? I thought ya'll were mythological creatures like knomes or unicorns.
Sarah: Well, if I had to choose I would say Team Jacob over Team Edward. But, I'm really Team Eric (from the Sookie universe).
Me: Why Jacob?
Sarah: He's just so much more real. And he's so good to Bella.
Me: Better to Bella than Edward?
Sarah: Definitely.
Me: You blasphemer!!!! *hangs up and cries into pillow*

Okay. Those were overdramatized versions of the actual conversations. And I like to think of myself as neither Team Edward or Team Jacob. But I'm not Team Switzerland, either. If I had to choose I would say Team Edward. He is so much dreamier. But, I can definitely understand why some people are Team Jacob. He is so sweet. And completely what Bella needed at that time in her life. And he had way more dimension than Edward. *ducks* Jacob is a wonderful character, but I can't bring myself to say I wish he would have ended up with Bella. Edward was the perfect choice for her. And initially, I was angry that Stephenie didn't let Jacob end up with Leah. (Who didn't feel sorry for Leah?) But, ultimately, I think it was wonderful for Jacob to imprint upon Renesmee. That way he would always be a part of Bella's life. And I love that Jacob and Edward could be friends. I must admit, though, it's kinda creepy that Jacob was in love with his soon-to-be mother-in-law. Yuck!


The appeal of Edward Cullen and Twilight

I'm going to take a moment to get "all psychological" on ya'll for a bit. Yesterday, I took a survey about Twilight. Some researchers are trying to study the appeal of Twilight to young girls and women. So, I took the time to fill out their little form. In doing so, it really got me thinking about why so many people are in love with this story and its characters.

Even my best friend (who is a lesbian, who normally stays away from all things mushy/girly, and who doesn't like to read) is absolutely in love with the story and characters. So, for her, the love of Edward is definitely not his completely apparent hotness factor. That made me think, what is it about this man and his relationship with Bella?

I don't think all of us necessarily want a man who is god-like in his appearance or someone who always says and does the right things. We don't want perfection. Maybe I shouldn't say we. I just know that that is true of me. Edward's appeal, for me, is his absolute and genuine desire to consume all that he can about Bella Swan. His curiosity about her is insatiable. I want someone in my life who genuinely cannot know enough about me. I know that when I am in a relationship, I can't get enough of the other person. I can't get to know them fast enough. I will spend hours just asking them about themselves. Maybe that is why I was a psychology major. I have these voyeuristic tendencies to get peeks at the parts of people that they don't want anyone else to see. I love learning about other people and why they make the decisions they make, what has happened to them in their lives for them to make those decisions. I feel like I have never really had that in my life. Someone who wanted to know all of me the way that I want to know them. I can always tell when someone is just waiting for their turn to speak when they are "listening" to me. Or people look away when you are talking to them. It's something that, as human beings, we do far too often to one another. I think we all have a deep-seated need to be heard. HEARD. Not just listened to.

I think that is why so many people love Edward. Because he genuinely wants to know Bella. Her thoughts, desires, emotions. Who doesn't need that in their life? That is what makes his appeal so universal.

And of course to every rule there is an exception. My next post will explain the odd occurrence of NOT loving Edward Cullen. *shock* *horror*

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Slumdog Millionaire and such

I watched Slumdog Millionaire and I must say it makes up for the suckfest that was The Haunting in Connecticut. It was so great! It def. deserved the Oscar win this year. Dev Patel is completely adorable.

I got some new nail polish. I ordered China Glaze's For Audrey off ebay and I love it! Still no gray polish yet. I also got the Love Rock Grand Duo and loves it. I bought the 187 brush (I know.) I finally broke down and bought it. I've only used it once because I haven't had time for makeup experimentation lately and so far I am disappointed. I washed the brush the night before and it was still pretty damp the next morning when I used it and I think that may have affected the brush's performance. It is now completely dry and I think I will test it out tomorrow.

Stuff I wanna buy:
- Chucks
- Running shoes/outfit
- Betsey Johnson shades
- Ray Bans?
- MAC shadows
- Boots body butter

I am going to post pictures soon of my MAC purchases and my "I Drive Like A Cullen" car decal. I am waiting for my friend to return my camera. He's had it forever and I have demanded to have it back by Friday...or else!! I miss it so.

Have to get up at 10 tomorrow and I know that doesn't sound early, but for me...on my off day...yeah that's early. Gotta fill out an application for a prospective job. One that I don't want. That is my problem. The only job I want is actress/rockstar/Robbie's lover and any other job seems like a big fat depressing waste of my time/my life. *sigh*

I know that damn fanfic will keep me WIDE AWAKE (pun intended. hehe.) tonight. Just like last night. I friggin' read 11 chapters. I haven't picked up my Sookie book in days. This story is just so good. It's got all the angst of Twilight with all the naughty stuff Twilight is missing. Perfection.